The Other Woman

I may have shared previously that my husband’s ex (known as BQ) is…well…insane. But that’s beside the point. The real tragedy here is that BQ has transferring her issues and psychoses to her daughter, my step daughter, who is twelve years old and a semingly normal girl on the surface. But Em has had issues and breakdowns over the past 2 to 3 years where she accuses her father of numerous things stemming from her belief that he abandoned her, her sister, and her mother. While we’ve tried talking her through her concerns and also sought counseling, more recently Em has reached the apex of sharing her mother’s psychoses. We feel troubled and helpless at this point because each time we feel we’ve made positive progress with her, she has another meltdown. And always around holidays and birthdays. To give you an idea, below is a series of text messages to her father this Christmas Eve. These messages came out of the blue because things had been relatively normal for the months leading up to receiving these. We can only attribute the initiation of these messages as a result of her mother and her sister being together for the holidays. Typically all hell breaks loose when these two women are together because the girls (Ce is 14) are exposed to an inordinate amount of negativity that involves rehashings of all past events in minute detail . Why can’t women let go and go on with their lives? Why must they wallow in helplessness and self righteousness?

Text messages received on Christmas Eve. What should we do?
- dad i love u i didnt mean it but i dont want to go on the vacation. i love u.
- dad. just pay mom or leave her alone u got 3 cars while she has an old one that can break down at any minute. we downsized houses a lot and u got another million dollar house. u made mom call jin li whenever shr has to go to the docter. u loved her for 20 years and this is sick. please just let my mom live without her having to worry if we’ll be in new jersey tomorrow. love u.
- how come ur not paying for us to stay in our home.i know whats goiing on. ur killing mom. jin li is especially killing mom. i have no desire to go on vacation with u. ur evil. this isnt u and i dont believe this is. but ur going to kill her and i will never forgive u.
- u kno2w exactly what ur doing to mom and ur eventually going to kill her. u dont even write ur own emails u sued her five times.
- answer me dad. why are u killing my mom.

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